Thursday, April 27, 2006

terlebih mOntokue

..few minutes before Exco meeting (masa aku tengah bz belek minutes kat lounge room)

HA : afternoon D.. where's everybody? wahh bz?
Aku : ohh.. hi, HA.. diaorg lepak kat dalam bilik.. *dem*..

..ntah camner la boleh keluar ayat pasar camtu. merah muka aku sekejap..

Aku : err, they're in my room. we're having a lil chat juz now
HA : *senyum then angguk*

*adeii*.. apa kena dgn aku nih.. dah mereng agaknya.. &^%$#@... len kali hati-hati bila nak berbahasa.. be more meticulous aD.. *sighs*.. hm, rasa mcm hipokrit plak.. is diz me?.. buat hal lah.


silent reader said...

Of the many men whom I am, whom we are,
I cannot settle on a single one.
They are lost to me under the cover of clothing
They have departed for another city.

When everything seems to be set
to show me off as a man of intelligence,
the fool I keep concealed on my person
takes over my talk and occupies my mouth.

On other occasions, I am dozing in the midst of people of some distinction,
and when I summon my courageous self,
a coward completely unknown to me
swaddles my poor skeleton in a thousand tiny reservations.

When a stately home bursts into flames,
instead of the fireman I summon,
an arsonist bursts on the scene,
and he is I. There is nothing I can do.
What must I do to distinguish myself?
How can I put myself together?

All the books I read
lionize dazzling hero figures,
brimming with self-assurance.
I die with envy of them;
and, in films where bullets fly on the wind,
I am left in envy of the cowboys,
left admiring even the horses.

But when I call upon my DASHING BEING,
out comes the same OLD LAZY SELF,
and so I never know just WHO I AM,
nor how many I am, nor WHO WE WILL BE BEING.
I would like to be able to touch a bell
and call up my real self, the truly me,
because if I really need my proper self,
I must not allow myself to disappear.

While I am writing, I am far away;
and when I come back, I have already left.
I should like to see if the same thing happens
to other people as it does to me,
to see if as many people are as I am,
and if they seem the same way to themselves.
When this problem has been thoroughly explored,
I am going to school myself so well in things
that, when I try to explain my problems,
I shall speak, not of self, but of geography.

pablo neruda - we are many

so aD, dun feel bad about urself.. sometimes, we need to be hypocrit in order to mix around. hey dun feel bad lah my dear.. u still have a lot of friends who sick wif u aite?

amizgig said...

silent reader:
u still have a lot of friends who sick wif u aite?.. really? sick of me? am i dat bad?..*thinking*.. in second thot, maybe kut.. anyway, i dont bother.. janji kita x kacau hidup org.. if they feel disturbed / annoyed dgn apa yg tertulis kat sini.. lantak lar.. *smiles*

silent reader said...

oh sprry my mistake.. i meant that stick with u.. sorry ok.. ahahahahaha

silent reader said...

ok.. my error.. sorry.. i didn't check my spelling.. hahaha.. main post je.. what i meant was u still have a lot of friends who stick wif u aite?.. sorry.. can u just ignore my previous post.. aiyak.. i think i make the same error again.. next time i better check my spelling before i post it to u? sorry dear i really mean no harm.. ahahahhaha..

amizgig said...

silent reader:
i thot so.. *smiles big + wink*

cikbiskut said...

just be urself...

Anonymous said...

best ad minum montokuk?-sidian

amizgig said...

i am who i am.. *grin*

weh.. macik tulih je.. manader minum.. tabaek tuu.. pemes ek mender tu kat sabah..*hehe*

Anonymous said...

oho..i pon x minum mendalah sedemikian..heheheeh...pemes la tuh, dah ko pun tau! ha ha ha_sidian

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